Saturday, May 13, 2006

An Odd Coincidence

So ... I work about 3 jobs. Not every week, so far I have worked 4 of the 5 this week. Tomorrow will be job #5. The odd coincidence is that I have touched the bottoms of 3 of my bosses. It wasn't a dare and I didn't set out to do this. When I woke up on Monday morning I didn't say to myself 'This week my goal will be to touch the buttocks of my bosses", it just happened organically.
On Monday, I had to drive that boss to pick up some merchandise. While she was in the store, a bee stung her. . . on her ass. She was wearing a brightly colored skirt.. . . probably looked like an easy daisy or some other flower with loose morals. When she gets beck in the car she says "A bee stung me. Here ! Feel the bump ?" and then I started feeling around her butt for a bump. I had groped around a bit before I thought that this was inappropriate behavior. I told her I would take her word for it. I also checked to make sure she wasn't allergic to bee stings, just in case she went into anaphylactic shock on the way back to the factory.
On Wednesday, a few of us were sitting around talking when we noticed the boss had new pants. She 's lost about 40 pounds in the last year and her clothes don't fit her right anymore. I was sizing up her pants and I gathered the baggy part at the back because I felt she still bought a size too big. They didn't make her ass look right. I really got a lot of material bunched up in my fist. She kind of skittered away exclaiming "Dorothy !!!You just grabbed my ass !" Actually I had grabbed the seat of her pants, but I wasn't going for a cheap feel, I just think she's underestimating how much weight she's lost. The incident concluded with all agreeing she needed an even smaller size.
Then today, my boss from today's job came into the office and asked me if I thought he was looking good. He's also lost about 50 pounds in the last 6 months, he's been working out . He's looking good. Every time he reaches a new goal , he feels good about himself. So, he said "Go ahead! Feel my ass! Go ahead ! " So. . . . .I did. Nothing sleezy. . an ass was being presented for grabbing and I just squeezed it. "Huh ? Pretty firm ? Yah ? I been working out ! " And then he left the office like I had handed him the Wilson file. My office mate was a little surprised, she was laughing. .. but I think I was a little unprofessional. I don't think I should feel an ass that doesn't belong to me. .. even if it is being offered.


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