Taking Another Shot

I blogged last night's show earlier today and it didn't take. Unfortunately , I compose directly on the computer and I am concerned that my earlier brilliance has disipated. Still, I press on . ..
SO, last night's show . .. . they weren't giving it up for Rick . SO, I didn't care what they thought and I told them that.I was going to have fun and keep going, regardless. Last night's set was for me. I went almost 5 minutes of unprepared material, just concepts I had been banging around and I just went onstage last night and threw it out there to see what would stick. I was surprised that there seemed to be more good stuff than bad. A lot of it needs some polishing , but it was a worthwhile endeavor. If nothing else, the other comics seemed to appreciate what I did. I didn't get to my regular material until the first blue light was lit.
I watched all of last week's shows on the dvd the Studio made. I think I have about 3 good jokes. I'm a lot funnier in my head. I can't believe Rick keeps letting me get onstage ! I called a veteran comic friend who is on the road right now and he said "Well, the good news is, you never have to do that show again. Belive it or not , that stuff makes you stronger" . . . stating the obvious. . .so I slammed the phone down. .. .BASTARD!!!!.. .. No, I didn't slam the phone down, slamming a cell phone is bad. But , of course he's right.
My relationship to comedy feels like the last guy that stopped calling me. I am bewildered, I thought we were having fun. I liked him, I thought he liked me . What happened Stand-up ? Huh ? Did you go back to your last girlfriend ? Huh ? Are her set-ups better than mine ? Are my punch lines too fatty for you ? Hum? What happened to us , Stand-Up ? Huh ? Actually, I'll always forgive comedy and go back to it. ... .
The show turned out pretty good , once it got rolling.On the bill were Sarah Blodgett, Jon Doherty, Jim Duffy-I liked his stuff, John Lincoln, Little Renata Tutko, Anthony Scofield and a new guy Elijah Joseph. However, for my money, I thought Ken Reid had the set of the night. He did a lot of material I hadn't seen before. My favorite line was "They smell like ferret cum and piss". . .that should be on a business card.
I'm sure doubt is part of the process . Doing this month is like a dream come true for me , but I'm really surprised at the uncertainty I am feeling. Seriously, watching that dvd, I'm not getting the laughs I thought were there. Maybe I'm more a fun person to hang out with than a stand-up comic. This has been a very educational process. One more week left. .. .