More Tales from The Booth

So, last week , we were having some trouble with the heating. It was particularly cold here last week and indoor heating was essential. The "guys" came down to fix the problem. By the time I got in last week, they had already been there , earlier in the week. This time they brought a supervisor. This was going to get fixed, lickety split ! Well , it did eventually heat up. However, near the end of the day , I had to use one of the toilets and freaked out upon alighting the throne because I thought the last person had forgotten to flush ! It was warm ! I looked down, and it was a clean bowl. When I was finished, after I had flushed, I could still feel heat emenating from the bowl. They had sone such a good job with the heat that ALL the water was hot now. The water in the sink was positively scalding ! I told my manager. She didn't believe me (why would I make something like that up ? ) (. .. I mean without a punchline). She goes to check it and comes out astonished that the water in the bowl is hot. Alas, it is after 3 PM and the "Guys" are gone for the day.
Today, a guy comes out of the mens room. Fairly clean cut, possibly recently homeless. He goes up to one of my co-workers and says he needs an ambulance. My co-worker asks him to repeat what he just said. "I need an ambulance". My co-worker tells him he can't just call an ambulance, we have to call a park ranger first. My co-worker goes to the ranger station to get the ranger. I should point out at this time that it was only me and the one co-worker on watch. The manager has gone to lunch and my other two co-workers are just gone. Thus , leaving me . . . alone . .. with the guy who wants an amulance. I 'm not sure if I should be worried. Before I could figure it out, my co-worker and the ranger enter.
The ranger asks the man what's going on? Is there a problem ? Are you hurt ? Why do you need an ambulance ? . . .. It could be anything. He's not obviously bleeding, maybe he has rectal bleeding ? Maybe he's having a diabetic episode ? Maybe he's stabbed, and like in the movies , the guy is just a little tired and then his friend figures out he's been shot ? Could be anything.
The Ranger asks him " Why do you want an ambulance ?"
The guy answers. . . . . okay . . . . .get this. . . his answer ? "Because I'm drunk !" and that poor ranger has to keep a straight face and inform the man that "We can't call ambulances for drunk people. You should go now".
And, thus, another day at the booth.