I Shall Not Overcome . . .

I went up to Lew's tonight. I've been looking forward to it for a while. I hadn't been there in over a month. Kris, the host, is my friend. Most of the other comics are guys I like, decent guys. When I say "guys" I mean men. As in , I was the only female on the bill.It's okay, it's not the first time I've been the only chick on the bill. I had a choice of being first or last. I told Kris either was okay with me. Then another comic came over to find out his order on the list and he had a choice to go first or last. He chose first, because. . . . he wanted to start drinking and he didn't want to perform with a beer or two under his belt . Hmmmm. . .
Only a couple of people were trying out new material. When they did the new stuff, it didn't go over that well, so they would revert back to the tried and true material. For the most part it's sexist, mysoginistic and unoriginal (as in "street"). Frankly, their new stuff will be good, it's just so new it didn't feel right yet. But , for the love of God, they were taking a chance ! That's what Lew's should be for, trying out new stuff. Kris did a song about Brad Delp's suicide. It was crass but I thought it was funny.And it was new. Dave Decker & Steve Gamblin did some new stuff. The rest of the show was about masterbation and doing despicle things to the ex-wife &/or girlfriend. Comic after comic just straddling the middle line.
I was tenth on the bill and then Kris put this new kid on ahead of me. Apparently he was of Korean heritage because he referred to himself as being a "Gook".He kept using the microphone as a penis. In his defense, he had a kind of compelling schtick. He frantically paced back and forth across the stage, but it was coordinated with the timing of the "set-up" and then the "punchline". The thing that got to me was his impersonation of his "Girlfriend" getting raped. Now, it's not just that it was about rape and that rape is a specific crime of violence against a woman. I honesty believe that any thing can be funny. This was not . It was not really funny. I didn't think it was funny. After his little "rape" scenario (oh ,excuse me , his "Rape Joke"), Kris brought me up.
I wish that I could be truly,personally, offended by any of this . Or that I would somehow feel afraid. Or even uncomfortable as a woman. Nope. What I felt was defeat. No one on this show was going to think about what they were doing. I couldn't think of anything other than I don't have a penis and I can't do any good masterbation jokes. I didn't feel like talking to the audience to get into my stuff. They laughed too hard at the other masterbation jokes. I said so to the audience. I couldn't rally. I lasted about two minutes, then I realized I was talking into the "Gook's" penis. I said "Kris. I'm sorry . I can't do this. I gotta go". And then , I left the stage.
I'm not mad. I'm not angry. I really like all these guys. It was a disappointing use of an evening. It was a waste of my time. Last night was a lot of fun. Everybody was bringing their best to the table (and it was a smaller audience). I brought my best to the table. By the time my chance came tonight, my spirit was already in the parking lot warming up the car, smoking a cigarette and writing a grocery list.
Moral of the story ? When offered the choice , go first and don't let anyone cut in front of you. Also, I gotta go up early, I ;m too tired to go last.
I hope this posts. Of course, after a night like tonight, I wouldn't be all that surprised if it doesn't. . . . .